I have a confession.
Every single day since starting this blog, I’ve known regret, worry and fear. Regret at letting everyone know I’m writing, worry that this book is still a good four years from completion, and fear that if it takes longer (or if I don’t even finish), I’ll have to explain my failure to everyone who was excited for me.
I’ve set you all up to be disappointed.
Truth is, I’m not a very good self-promoter (maybe that’s why my career as a musician has become stagnant). It took a lot for me to announce my book, and now I’m second-guessing that decision. Up until a month ago, no one knew I was writing. No one cared. Now it’s out in the open. Now if I fail, everyone will know. Is that motivation or masochism?
I guess the point of this post (if there even is one) is to admit that I may have been a bit hasty with my announcement. I was excited. I still am excited. I can’t wait to share my world with all of you. But I need patience. I need understanding and support. This is a mountainous journey I’ve embarked upon, and there’s a good chance I won’t reach my destination.
But I suppose I’d rather try and fail (even if it means failing in front of everyone) than not try at all (see mantra post below).
“It’s better to do a thing than live in fear of it.”
-Logen Ninefingers, The First Law Trilogy by Joe Abercrombie
So by all means, be excited. I still hope to have a rough draft of Part 1 completed by December. But if Christmas comes and goes and I’m still plugging away, I hope you’ll forgive me. And maybe I’ll even be able to forgive myself.
Alright, I better end this before it I wind up listening to “How To Disappear Completely” in the dark.
In the immortal words of Bart and Homer:
”So wait a minute, this means I’m gonna be a failure?”
”Yes, son, a spectacular failure.”